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Designed by: hawKS
Pictures from: ~nandolucas
Codings: Ebullient*

joou's To Do List (by order of importance)

1. Start on the A&Es
2. Study for the BigS
3. Study for Crab
4. Sleep
5. Exercise
6. Watch TV/anime
7. NE Quiz (Wed)
8. Sort out the Options
9. Figure out the Philo
10. Volunteer somewhere
11. Brush up the culinary skills
12. Golf
13. Knit
14. Paint the K
15. Crash ram's house with xinmin for a wii party (wed?)
16. Crash chong's house
17. Crash fik's house for a greys marathon (9/9)
18. Crash erik's house
19. Paint the pH
20. Take Spanish lessons
21. Take guitar lessons
22. Take jap lessons from zan
23. Take drumming lessons?

Things i have to, need to, absolutely must do
Things i probably have no time to do
edit:
Accomplished!
Unaccomplished D:
/edit

sad huh, how the things i have to do obviously outweighs the things i want to do.

ah wells, at least i managed to fit a few of them in. i hope.

Escaped {5:52 pm}

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spent the whole morning making a lasagna for lunch, so im pretty much exhausted right now D: plus i smell like tomatoes.

and because i forgot about it in the previous post, heres


Broken

dont try and judge my emotions though, i was playing with a concept for this one, not creating a source to pour out my non-existent emoness. now that the exams are over, i can probably start on a few pieces i had been sitting on, so look out for those when im done with them (:

Escaped {2:08 pm}

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edit: new song up! black and gold by sam sparro, my eya companion.

AND IMMA BACKK.

as promised. 29/09/08. im quite happy with myself for being so disciplined and not allowing myself to blog till the end of everythings. (-hereby ignores her crab tests in T4W1-). since i began a policy of "splendid isolation" (only the americans have such funky names for policies that ignore people) loads of stuffums have happened, so i'll pretty much cover as much as i can in extreme succinct-ness.

it is sufficient to say that im pretty much extremely happy now. kinda like the OLYMPICS OLYMPICS OLYMPICS fireworks!



speaking about the OLYMPICS OLYMPICS OLYMPICS! it was amazing. although i didnt really have time to enjoy the last few days due to the above mentioned eyas, whatever i did manage to catch between my (non-existent) free times and in between classes (PHELPS! ) was really just amazing. i really think china has proven itself this time and done more than anyone could ever dream of accomplishing, right from the opening ceremony (which to me, was very much like a dream, with all the things floating about and moving in scary sychro-ness and all xD).

what i did not enjoy very much, was certain country's people's insistence on lambasting china over pointless issues. i mean, compare the athens olympics (in which a spectator jumped into the pool during the diving finals) to beijing's and tell me which one was a better organised. china have been perfect hosts to the competitors and have honoured their sporting ambitions in every possible way. fake fireworks and singing girls and gymnasts who look young should not be discussed over the accomplishments these athletes have achieved. in fact, i think all the athletes have been truly amazing (even though a few were disappointing) and i've really enjoyed watching the competitions, because they have reminded me of what humans are truly capable of. at least thats what the olympics are to me. a celebration of what humans are capable of, and what our spirit allows us to achieve.

but all good things come to an end, so i shall move on now. overall, the eyas were not toooo bad, although there were a few disappointing papers (as usual). BUT THEY'RE OVER NOW SO NO MORE TALK ABOUT THEM. once i get my crab papers outta the way i will be able to focus on truly important things! soon soon soon.

before i move on to our post-eya celebrations and todays teachers day celebrations, i would like to mention a few peeps who have helped me make it through the toughest of the toughest mugging periods.

dear fik, (see i told you i'll mention you). THANK YOU. i think your essays may have singlehandedly helped pull my appreciation of english up a notch, even if it may not be reflected in my own essays. i really enjoy reading your essays, because they are so inspiring. they are extremely well written and they really reflect how much you understand and are able to manipulate the language to serve your point. which is totally cool. ^^

dear mr lim (cp), hi. thanks for the bio help! saturday last minute make up session as well as answering random questions at random times have been a great help (: im not too sure about how i did for the test though, but ah wells. i still have hardy-weinberg equations to worry about T.T

dear sarah chong, ramyia, fangyi and annie, as well as ruth, chan and various other peoples in 411, arigato! your help= greatly appreciated. i really love how our class gets together and shares info/mugs with each other. ^^ hugs goes out to everyone!

dear geoff, thank you, my olympics buddy!, for the moral support and blatantly koped cheers.

and of course, love goes out to everyone else who were there. i love my friends for being so funky.

okay! moving ons nowsss.

after the exams on thursday, our class (excluding the french people who sadly had french test ): ), as the occasion called for, promptly went OUT. so sum our trip up, we have


US (on 143, which took us on a nice little tour about Singapore)


US (outside the monorail station)


AND MORE US (at siloso beach!)

yuppp, we went to sentosa xD. it was quite a lot of fun, although in the end a couple of us just gave up trying to play beachball/frisbee because it was way too hot. xD so we sat around drinking slurpee and pretended we were in a different country ^^


like that! nice photo right. fik lent me kate to take that.

sadly though, despite the euphoria, there was still school today D: not that it was that bad, since it was teachers day, which means short days and concerts and presents! i managed to track all my teachers down really fast, so erik sarah and i could go out! (again)

we headed down to cineleisure for wall-e and then made a beeline for the main attraction after that: SAKAE BUFFET. in which we sat for 2++ hours and ate like crazy. (yes i am very fat now and need to exercise soon before i cross the point of no return) i love going out with erik and sarah and co. cos eriks good with food and sarahs good with crap! so you go out with them you get good food and good crap xD

yeah, so as can be seen, my past few weeks have been spent on doing too many things and having too little sleep. thus, THIS BLOG POST ENDS HERE.

thanks for reading xD it was longgggg.

Escaped {4:18 pm}

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i dont like having to do this, so i thought about it for quite some time. but with the eyas just round the corner, i think a hiatus is still best.


(for non-chinese readers: the band on my head translates literally to MUST WIN. in other words, I WILL OWN EYAS.)


sorry darlings (:

in the mean time, if you're in need of some daily entertainment, try fik's blog here (although, as mentioned before, you need a lj account to view it) or annies blog here (warning: may contain traces of cheem music terms).

thanks guys.

blog re-opening date: 29/08/08, that is, if i dont break my hiatus before my eyas end, although the probability of that ranks quite high.

Escaped {8:07 pm}

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(this is a very long post. (: )

i.
my ctrl key just broke. no actually its just the keypad, which i could have easily replaced with the spare ctrl key i have from the last time my motherboard got soaked in water and we had to send my laptop for repair. BUT. (of course there always is a but.) MY MOM THREW THE PARTS AWAY. without even checking with me to see if they were totally and completely useless. so now we have to do things the difficult way and send my laptop to repair again (see it still works, its just not very easy to press). im considering just leaving it be. after all, it still works.

unless, of course, i can get it replaced for free. then maybe i'll let go of my laptop for a while so that i can get it back in shape again xD

ii.
chaos was o.o.

for those who recall my post on sysf, you would realise that thats exactly what i said about sysf after that ended. because, yes, the sentiments are nearly identical. once again, my team and i were thrown into a sort of alternate universe where nothing was what we expected and because of that, we failed to do as well as we could have.

long story cut short, everyone thought chaos was the formal, scientific lecture styled competitions. so we prepared just that, a ppt with our findings and conclusions. but no, that was NOT what the judges were looking for. at all. in fact, they were expecting a snazzy, interesting, innovative presentation complete with plots and animation and all. and despite sufens best efforts to find out the format of the presentation, we were, evidently, not told of this crucial point.

needless to say, we presented a stark contrast to all of the rest of the groups. think graphs and ppt vs keynote and extremely professional animations of robots attacking human race. yeah.

we came in with a commendation award. nigel fong's team, as expected, came in first.

im not saying that i think we should rush up to moe and complain about how it isnt fair that we were competing at a different plane to begin with. neither am i being a sore loser about this whole thing. theres no point in either. im just saying, given our potential, our knowledge (everything the winning group knew we knew as well, so we definitely did not lose out on our research) it is quite a waste that we should lose out on a presentation that we could have easily delivered. our group is in no way lacking of creativity or imagination. sure, we may not be IT geniuses like those ri guys, but hey, we're at least capable of presenting a reasonable challenge. maybe even come in top 3 (perhaps not 1st, because really, they were awesome and completely deserved to win) after all, the judge did say that our report was good, which means we did have our substance.

so yeah. slightly disappointed, but im moving on. after all, everything chaos aimed to do (arm us with knowledge about real life probs and blah), i have acheived. we have acheived. so in that sense, we are all winners ^^. (as cliched as that sounds)

iii.


tonight! my uncle is so lucky he won a ticket to the opening ceremony! -envious-

all the best to tingwen, rgs' very own olympic hero ^^ i think its so cool. i'll most certainly never get the chance in my whole life to compete in the olympics xD

iv.
i finally got my hands on some of my camwhore pics, although xm still owes me a lot.



ram and i did all the no.s from 1 to 10 xD. this is 8.

oh the things we do in class :D

v.
psb gm on thurs. i think as my term draws closer and closer to its end (yet another reminder of YES I AM LEAVING THIS ALL BEHIND SOON) i get more and more reflective of my time as a psl. in a retrospective kind of way.

the first year was fun. the 104 ics: yen. chow, elaine, are awesome people that i will always love, and i will definitely always treasure that year. all the seniors: andrea, joelynn, yityng!, jacky, all the juniors: weiqi <3/sec ones: 104! and everyone else in between helped make my first year as a psl a truely memorable one. it was the year i learnt a lot a lot.

the second year, this year, was in many ways not what ive expected. being a mentor, a spsl, isnt easy. im not too sure ive been the kind of spsl i had hoped to be. have i offered helpful advice? a listening ear to my juniors? someone they think they can talk to and rely on? have i made a difference to their psl experience? have i made a difference to the board? i dont know, but i do hope so.

although i dont think i would be running for council next year, i dont think my leadership jounrey would just end here. i will always be grateful to psb, because it gave me so many so many opportunities to learn, to challenge myself and to hone my leadership skills. and it taught me things i wouldnt have learnt elsewhere. and through these two years, ive grown.

i heart rgpsb.

vi.
new blog song! New Soul by Yael Naim. apparently, zaki thinks its very me >< (must be the random and weird happy beats part coupled with equally random and weird lalalas)

vii.
nday celebs today ^^ 411, as usual, went absolutely mad with highness. i mean, we sang/screamed Munnaeru Vaalibaa at the top of our voices in the middle of the amphi. i guess thats what i really truly love about my class- we are so spontaneous/ enthu! :D


(because i have yet to get my hands on the nday photos)

viii.
IVE COME TO THE END :D for those who actually read all 8 parts, yay you! (you have a lot of time xD. or is my life really that interesting?)

Escaped {5:41 pm}

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to you:

i saw a different side of you today.
a side i didnt recognise.
ive tried to pretend i didnt know.
that i couldnt hear the whispers.

that they were all wrong,
that it couldnt be.

ive tried so hard to look for that you. the one i knew.
tried to pretend that you didnt change.
that you are still who you used to be.

but i cant find her anymore.

what do i do?
how can i still stand by you,
when i no longer know who it is ive been supporting,
defending,
trusting.

im tired of asking.
tired of guessing.
tired of the blind faith i had in you.

i dont know how much longer i can do this.

so please, show me you're still there.

please. pull it together. i know you can.

because im beginning to lose faith.

love, me.

Escaped {5:15 pm}

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i read amandachins blog just now and i can identify. if you even do come here anymore, I LOVE YOU GIRL THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ROCKIN'.

firstly, i apologise if my post ytd had caused any alarm. i just needed to get some stuff out of my system and this was the best place. sorta like those activities where you write everything down and then crumple it up and throw it away. cept this doesnt disappear, and no im not deleting it, because i think its helpful and its normal for it to be there. happy posts all the time gets a little strange. so yeah, until the prob gets sorted out, which will not be soon, dont be surprised to see a few more of those. although it will not be made a habit because then that would just be detrimental. and they are not a cause for alarm, just me working my way around certain unpleasant events.

surprisingly, or maybe not so much so, i woke up this morning feeling a whole lot better. in fact, the last time i rmb feeling so happy was sec2. maybe my brain just died and went to heaven, or maybe that post really helped.

i guess we're all coping with our own devils.

thus, today was generally a good day. one of those days where everything is clear! instead of just a mad rush for timetimetime. spsb exco gm after school was quite random. ms koh's so sweet she bought everyone two subway cookies each! cept i fed one to mr lim who was starving like crazy, and the other i gave to my sis who practically worships them.

then was the surprise chaos meeting i didnt know about until lunch. almost all the teachers think we WILL WIN TMR. cept mr lim. i just hope we dont come in 6th? -shrugs- we did improve quite a lot, after mr tee managed to convince all of us to use some (ac)FLUFF.

mr tee: "you girls have the whole package, content and presentation. plus, nothing please the judges more than seeing pretty, knowledgable girls."

o.o --> T.T --> xD

Escaped {4:51 pm}

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before i launch into my emo post, edit: claire li what did you DO?! apparently its not you fault. i apologise. /edit scared me for a moment i thought someone hacked into my account. if my blog gets deleted i'll just cry. two years of invested emotions makes this semi-private space very important to my current fragile emotional state.

yes. fragile emotional state. sighs. all this is so... much. i mean. IM FREAKING 16 YEARS OLD. there are some things i still want to do, some things i still DONT WANT TO THINK ABOUT. but of course i have no choice. and its getting a little suffocating, despite my best abilities to remain optimistic.

i guess i really need to talk to people. someone, anyone? but i cant cos well, everyones busy and it makes me super guilty when i talk to someone thinking that hey she/he might be doing something more impt that listening to me rant about myself. besides it not like many people can relate to my position anws.

i need... i dont even know what i need. counselling doesnt help solve my problem, because its not an emotional problem anws, and neither would other inane things like slacking and watching movies. or even doodling.

argh. i so do hate emo posts. but where else can i put all this... frustration?!

Escaped {7:53 pm}

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and because i forgot to mention in the previous post.

the sec 4 squashers stood down from cca last friday. means, NO MORE SQUASH. for the rest of my life.

not too sure if i should be glad or nostalgic about this new event, but one word to describe it: AWKWARD. just to give you guys a better idea of exactly how awkward it was:

-coach returns after confirming the news with mr de souza-
coach: yeah correct. stand down already.
me : oh. (is secretly happy because that means i have time to eat dinner before in convo!)
-pause-
me: bye coach.
coach: -stares whilst searching for the words- um. ok. bye. good luck for your studies.
me: thanks coach. -pause- EDEN! -runs away from strange conversation-

yeah. it was weird.

Escaped {2:12 pm}

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we learn to add, then to subtract.

we learn to multiply, then to divide.

we learn to expand, then to factorise.

we learn to differentiate, then to integrate.

srsly. i'll never get why mathematicians feel so proud of being able to turn 360 degrees and return to where they started.

or why they find it so kewl to make up questions just to torture their own brain cells.

Leavin' by Jesse McCartney (i find it very amusing that my own blog song is telling me "Don't stress, Don't Stress, Don't stress...". How very encouraging xD )

Escaped {1:07 pm}

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chaos is on wednesday. for the uninformed, that stands for Creative & Heuristic Applications of Science, and its a science competition, not an synonym for life.

my team, sufen (physics), cas (math), sanu (bio) and me (chem) makes the only all girls team amongst all six finalists. ri has two teams, one of which includes nigel fong. of all i heard about him, ive concluded that his geniusness is not to be underestimated. ah wells. im already happy we got into the finals ^^.

today was a long day, with chaos prep and in convo after school (in which xm that poor poor thing sitting next to me spent nodding off because she didnt sleep a wink last night chionging hist pt amongst other things. poor girl ): ). we spent the time in between recollecting our glorious rgps days! haha everytime we drag out the "old days" im always struck by:

1. how gigantic a role liting played in them. i think not matter what happens she'll be someone i know i can count on, even if we arent in as much contact as we used to be. but knowing someone for half your life makes a BIG difference.
2. how fast time flies
3. how utterly stupid we used to be
4. how utterly stupid we still are

ten years of rafflesian-ness, this year makes. although maybe only the past four really counted as being a rafflesian. but you get what i mean. green black white!

on a seperate note: happy international friendship day! to my friends out there thanks so much for the <33 ^^ thats the least i have to say. i would dedicate more time to thanking yall but my brain is.... not functioning now.



i love gerberas! esp this one since its a hybrid and thus both yellow and orange, which combines the two of my favourite gerbera colours in one.

dreaming of you is beginning to creep me out.

Escaped {10:44 pm}

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